I have had diverticulitis three or four times before. I have taken the icky medicine and been so very sick and was even hospitalized for it. I don’t ever remember losing weight. I have heard that people do.
Prior to this bout of illness, and the other illnesses I had over the summer, I would usually not eat breakfast, perhaps forget to eat lunch or just skip it, drink coffee all day and then eat at night. Sometimes I would “binge eat” at night. Just eat and eat and eat.
I started eating breakfast with this bout of divers because I had so much awful medicine to take and I had to have something in my stomach. So for the past five weeks, I have had a small amount of food for breakfast, lunch and dinner. This is not including the four days of liquids only.
I have discovered that I have lost another 4 pounds in 2 weeks. I should never have stepped on the scale.
Most people would be happy to lose weight. Under normal circumstances, I would be. But because I have never lost weight before with divers, why am I losing it now? These thoughts set in and take hold of me and then of course I consult Mr. Google and read that if one keeps losing weight they could have cancer and that leads to more morose thoughts and it just goes round and round until I am making myself sick…..
It is true that I don’t want to eat anything at all. Unless the hubs fixes me like an egg sandwich (I don’t even like it) – I may eat like 5 teaspoons of yogurt for breakfast or maybe 2 small containers of applesauce because they just slide right down. For lunch I eat a sandwich with turkey and two pieces of bread. I have been grinding up broccoli for the past few days and eating that in the late afternoon followed by two baked potatoes when the hubs gets home. Throughout the day I drink water which I really am getting tired of and maybe 2/3 cups of iced coffee (which is probably not good for me)…..I also drink a bottle of water with yucky fiber in it. Gross. I may increase that after seeing the gastro doc this upcoming week but am afraid to add more fiber now. So that’s the menu.
I hate food right now. I don’t want to eat anything. The only reason I am eating at all is because the hubs Took Over and I am getting my strength back little by little. I am not exercising nor doing much of anything that would cause me to lose weight. I try and walk around our little acre everyday or go out to the store or run an errand each day. That’s about all I can do for now.
Still, the anxiety sets in and is very Happy because I am nervous…